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LOCAL MATTERS
SEEM SERIOUS

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If Common Knowledge Meant Anything It Wouldn't Be Called Common
January 3, 2008                                                 © 2008 JAN COX

 

The outfitters for far distant safaris are always in your home town.
(Which is just as well.)
[Hey, you don't see any connection between one and the other one, do you? -- Naw.]

 

One guy did imitations of dead people “SO” good...

 

One reason Life has provided Secondary Institutions is so that therein men may collect and make local phenomena seem...seem, oh, I don't know, somehow, "more important."

 

There are reports of a developing race over on a young planet who are able to "say what they mean"...(I think it should be noted that this is through “no” fault of their own.)

 

Upon reading the declaration,
"Most of the world's Great Thoughts
started out as something else,"
this one guy gleefully thought, "Boy am “I” on the right track!"

 

One ole sorehead (operating under conditions I don't care to go into) suddenly turned to his son and said, "Never mind what they tell you EVERYBODY asked to be born."

 

There was once a race known as the "Silent Ones"
(about whom little is heard).
(Well, what'd they expect!)

 

Most local matters seem serious.

 

One expelled student took the platitude, so beloved by linguistic philosophers, that says, "Everything is what it is, and cannot be another.", and combining it with the subversive element that states, "Everything is what it is and then some.", was able to construct a non-lethal incendiary device that first lit up, then destroyed his own, old laboratory.

 


Endocrine Sports Up-Date:
At the end of six rounds, hormones are ahead on points, if not actual knock downs.

 

One of the tongue lashers over in the speaker's area of the park concluded his remarks by declaring that all the lame should be able to, with impunity, cripple one other person, and a surly sort standing by the side said, "I thought that's what's goin' on already."

 


You can forget about oak and soft pine--
nouns are the best whittlin' material.

 

Another example of breath-taking-justice at a confined, local level; guy says, "Whenever I'm frightened I sing to myself.", and his partner says, "The only thing that really frightens me is sometimes I hear this really, really terrible singing."

 


Question:
Would you prefer to be an experienced, competent captain, or a boat?
Follow Up Query:
Do you actually believe you could have such a choice?
The Play-The-Bums-Off-The-Stage Question:
How much longer are you gonna seriously entertain binary possibilities and inquiries? – “HUH?”!!

 

When anyone says, "Let's hear it for your friends and mine," you can be pretty sure their greater interest is in the latter...(Same holds true with your old brain's favorable attitude toward its old familiar thoughts.)

 

 
  J
 
 

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