homepage          THE DAILY NEWS!              email

 

A gigantic tri-colored snake with at least four directions got into a guy's house and he really didn't know what to do about it.

 

A speaker over in the park declaimed,
“We live in perilous time…perilous times indeed.”
And a fellow under an unbleached pine tree took him aside and said,
“Consider there are but three possibilities:

Live in perilous times,
don’t be alive at all, or
don’t live in perilous times.”

And the speaker pondered and replied,
“Your first two choices I perceive but the third seems alien yet intriguing. How might I pursue it?” And the guy from under the tree smiled.

 

 

All questions that have “any” guts are trick questions.

 

What is wrong with the following sentence?
(Quote): "There's nothing wrong with this sentence."

 

 

Those who remember their childhood remember too much...
(and not very well at that).

Beauty has no duty.
(And that, says Uncle Faraway, is the beauty of it, and why all heroes are ugly.)

 

 

Those who write odes of praise about another specific person
might consider some of the several over-the-counter drugs available.

 

 

Speaking of heroes, over in another Galaxy I've heard tell
of a warrior chieftain so frightening that he'd “dared his life”
to end on him....and thus far the threat's worked.

 

Each human has a daily “Babble Quotient”
which Life generally expects him to fulfill.

 

 

Just beyond space
and a big past time
is a place where they
broadcast everybody's thoughts.

 

 

As he left the chapel after morning vapors - I mean vespers - this one general straightened his hat, tucked in his fat, assumed the “thoughtful-military” pose and said, "Better to have but a few honest men than a bad hair cut."

 

 

The only profitable much less inhabitable decisions
are unilateral decisions.

 
  J