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Summary = See Below
Diagrams = See Below in transcript, Diagram #005
Transcript = See Below
Summary by TK
Jan Cox Talk 96, Dec 29, 1983, runtime (?)
[Discussion of the "problem" of a feeling of isolation from Group (esp. old ATL Group) written about by one of the west coasters. Group cohesion/ritual in life in general. Expectation of profitable interchange --feeling of belonging to larger entity. Comfort-security of "club" organization. ]
[Sacrifice --of your "comfort" in life.]
[Hostility is a kind of magnetic tension that holds life together. ]
[Chairman of the board analogy: rubber stamp approval of lackey's (lower circuitry) proposals. Somebody must be in charge. A Real CEO. ]
[New Year's Present: Sex and laughter activation of bridge-points in the spine. Life normally restricts these points--allowing periodic energy passage. Sex opens the lower point; laughter opens the upper one. In ordinary life, laughter dissipates energy (hostility based). Real laughter does not. Same with sex. ]
[Psychology--life's attempt to understand itself by study of man's form.]
[How can it be that some individuals can be more awake than Life in general. i.e. beyond hostility while life is involved still in wars? Consider the responsibility of such individuals.
[TASK: Consider: "The expansion of Life is the message--Man is the Medium"--should always remember this.
EVERYONE FEELS ISOLATED, IT'S NOT A PERSONAL PROBLEM
Document: 96, December 29, 1983
Copyright(c) Jan M. Cox, 1983
Everyone, at times, experiences a sensation of isolation, of alienation. All of humanity is wired to feel left out or displaced, at times. The so-called "problem" of alienation does reflect the nature of Life and the way Man is ordinarily wired. However, within the context of This Thing, there is no such thing as a "problem". Hence, there can be no solution to the "problem of isolation" when approached from an ordinary perspective. The fact that everyone believes they have problems is not a problem either, though it does serve a purpose.
The Red Circuit experiences a quite real shock when it finds itself displaced to a new locale, or within a new situation. If you belong here, regardless of the number of years you've been involved, you can not allow this shock to work its way into the Yellow Circuitry, into thinking: "What am I doing here?" This reaction is real, and it serves a purpose in the ordinary world, but not for those attempting to do This.
Some of the popular prophets throughout history have pointed out that certain people have no home or homeland. No one place to hang their hats. For a few, "the right place" does not exist because there is no single right place. In a sense, the more you do This, the more you do become a displaced person. You are continually disoriented, though its origins differ from the voice asking, "What am I doing in this strange place? This is unfamiliar. This is uncomfortable. I want to go home."
The drive to seek out and become a member of a group, of any nature, is inherent in the neural wiring system of men. Likewise, it is expected that some form of energy exchange will occur between its members. Such an expectation is not planned, nor is it simply the anticipation of a pleasurable commonality. Any group, be they The Young Politicians, The Library Lovers, or Swami X and his followers, are united by an invisible sense of cohesiveness. Each of the members might dress alike, they might all shave their heads, or jointly adopt a particular philosophy, but the underlying link among all group members is the expectation of some form of profitable energy exchange. The lower circuitry understands that the feeling of: "I am now a part of something new and it's exciting" is an outcome of such an exchange.
Using ordinary, psychological sounding terminology, the circuitry seeks out an extended family unit or community. Those who hear of This Thing believe that they, too, are looking for such a family, or a place of comfort and security, or a father figure. Again, we are talking about the feeling of being absorbed into something that is larger than the individual. "I'm a member of The Young Politicians. I'm part of something great." Beyond the spoken words, is the search for a new level of comfort. "Here I am, amidst thousands of people who have all united here at this convention, and I am a part of it. I'm not a hapless stranger."
Some of you joined this group, expecting to be magically catapulted into a higher state of consciousness. And if not that, to at least have found a new community, a new, secure resting place. "We're all in this together. We'll hold hands and discuss This. Have fun together. Cry together. And have our ups and downs together." That sort of scenario. Again, this serves a useful function in the ordinary world, for ordinary people. If such comfort is what you seek, then you'll need to look elsewhere for it.
You may "feel" unwanted here, "feel" as though you are being treated harshly. I have even been asked if members of this group were instructed to treat others among you in a cool fashion. This has not been the case. Remember, there is no such thing as "imagination". Anything imaginable does reflect some piece of reality. To look around you, and determine for yourself that you are being treated harshly or are unwanted here, are the products of the binary perceptions of the ordinary man's Yellow Circuit. Fragmented perceptions of a wider reality. Everyone in Life feels isolated. Everyone seeks comfort. But within the context of This Thing, to imagine yourself being left out is to See nothing.
If you belong here, if you are struggling to grow beyond Line-level consciousness, then I am the best friend you have. But I am not the friend to whomever you were before you found This. I am no friend to your ordinary self. I Understand the effect I seem to have. I may appear to be cold, harsh, and unfeeling. This Thing can't be compared with anything you've been exposed to, have read about, or imagined to be a great secret work. It is my responsibility to see that This does not become the apparently all encompassing, all embracing, comforting kind of atmosphere that is necessary and quite predictable in the ordinary world. Remember, there is nothing wrong with that, and it serves a purpose out in Life. But it serves no valuable function Here. Such an atmosphere can produce a great inclination to arrest all personal effort.
Life is arranged for particular groups of people to be drawn together. Regardless of whether they call themselves the Ice Skaters League, Seekers After the Great Truth, or the Young Politicians, the organization itself takes on a life of its own. The group becomes its own end. It's apparent basis is expressed in the feeling that: "I love being with these people. They are my kind of people." Again, we are talking about prearranged magnetic wiring. People being magnetically and mechanically attracted to join together in particular and very specific groupings. You will not find classical music scholars joining The Mud Wrestlers League.
Alternatively, none of you here would have been ordinarily drawn together. Without a doubt, the first time you met some of the people attracted to This Thing, something in you reacted negatively. At Line level there is nothing inherently wrong with such a reaction. It is not evil. Any mechanical energy transfer between people will produce a reaction that is apparently either positive, "this is my kind of person", or negative, "this is not my kind of person", unless there is no energy exchanged. Once you begin to Understand its mechanical nature, it then becomes something to See and transcend. You can not do This and be strictly among, "my kind of people".
You are absolutely mistaken if you believe I am unaware of those among you who feel isolated, or that This Thing is harsh. I could, for any of you who feel as though you're ofttimes hanging by your toes, at the edge of This, take you aside and cure you of such feelings in a moment or two. Like a booster shot, I might have to take you aside once each year, and repeat the dose. Instantly, you would feel safe and secure. To achieve that sort of security, you might just as well join the Ice Skaters League. Do you Understand that any apparent cure would be your death in This? As I said earlier, an apparently secure, comforting atmosphere produces the inclination to halt any personal effort.
Let me also point out that no one who Understands enough could ever treat another harshly. Could never make another feel unwanted here. If that happened here, even if that person had been with me for years, they would be gone forever. I would have no other choice.
I will mention, getting closer to a non-binary reality, something that many of you should already suspect, as well as fear. As more energy is transformed here, as more people make Real effort, the less attached you become to your own ordinary wired nervous system. Those not making a similar effort will begin to feel the strain on their own wiring system. Should this be the case, you will feel estranged and isolated. If you are making no effort to grow beyond the Line, feeling isolated is, to say the least, a charitable understatement. That's a fact. You can suddenly feel as though, literally, everyone has turned against you. Now if you can not hear what I am saying, Consider the possibility that you don't belong Here. If you belong Here, this is the only place to be.
The question of whether or not I like you, you like me, or any of you like or dislike each other is irrelevant to our purposes. In all ordinary situations it is of supreme importance. To dislike this or that is a way people identify themselves. It's the way people navigate. The unstated simultaneous condition whereby people are mechanically attracted to each other, is a mechanical repulsion toward someone else. Likewise, a mechanical magnetic attraction between nervous systems can shift slightly, turning the energy exchange into dislike and feeling alienated or scapegoated. They are products of the same process. It's not right or wrong. It's the nature of Life.
If you belong Here, you've got to ignore the ordinary voices opining over your isolated condition. It's not a unique condition. Everyone feels that way. You're fighting invisible foes. You're struggling to overcome "the problem of feeling unwanted" and I've already told you that there is no such thing as a problem. If you belong here, the voices that speak of self-pity and feeling estranged are irrelevant. Everyone has such voices. You personally can not heed them, and simultaneously do This. The issue of whether or not any of you are unwanted is moot. None of you are individually chosen. Either you belong Here or you don't. If this is where you belong, there is nowhere else to go.
Consider any of the historical examples of people attempting to grow beyond the Line. At the horizontal level, you might imagine, "Gee, what fun they must have had, being associated with prophets who were talking directly to the gods. Off on great journeys. Magically compelling others to join their circle. Sitting around the campfire singing songs, watching out for each other, presenting a strong front against their enemies." Every nervous system dreams of such moments. You should be able to See that. Of course, today you wouldn't have to engage in actual combat, making it that much easier for you, but to dream about it, ahh. "Boy, what fun. Those were the good old days. They sure don't make groups like that anymore."
Now listen fast. In a sense, This Thing can not exist without a group. Additionally, if the ancient religious indeed existed, though I am not saying they did, and if they were involved in the process of growing beyond the Level of consciousness at that time, there is no source for their information. Again, listen fast, because this does not fit into Yellow Circuit consciousness. If such figures in history existed and lived beyond Line-level consciousness, they did not do it in a group. This does not fit in with the stories which commonly circulate today. If they did live beyond the Line, and were the epitome of such a state of consciousness, they had to be in a position of isolation, themselves. In a sense, unwanted and unwelcomed, appearing harsh and unfeeling. What if that's the ultimate way to do This Thing? Remember, this example can't fit, because none of you can do it...and I'm not saying they did.
As far as words go, there are certain things you must do yourself. The more you grow beyond the Line, the more you are alone, though not in a way ordinarily seen.
Throughout history, stories have circulated about people involved in making sacrifices. They range from the sacrificing of animals and the burning of crops at the altars of the gods, to stories of those who evidently sacrificed their own lives. Of course, it is only after their death that the idea of a prophet or religious figure sacrificing his own life even emerges, along with the idea that he knew what he was doing. "He sacrificed his life for us." Can you See that this is a reflection of the fact that ordinary people are not confronted with the need to make their own sacrifices.
The ultimate sacrifice is the sacrifice of your own ordinary position in the grid. The position you always occupy is comfortable, even when you're miserable, because part of being ordinary is being miserable. If you're ordinary, you feel comfortable in your misery. And there are always people who will hold your hand, and listen to your grievances. There are always places to find comfort.
In a sense, doing This is not comfortable. You're traveling unfamiliar roads and you might feel as though you've lost your orientation. Nothing in Life can prepare you for This. Of course, not surprisingly, you expected to get into This and encounter a new circle of spiritual comfort. Perform humanitarian deeds. Read philosophic works. We don't, and I have no inclination to do so.
The ultimate sacrifice is giving up your grid position. It is easy enough to imagine ancient religious or mythical figures "paying the price" by dying for their beliefs. At that point, all you're required to do is sign up as a follower, since he's already paid for your sins. In This, no one else can pay this kind of price. If you don't pay it, it doesn't get paid. Initially, I pay part of the price. Right now it's as though I was giving out an allowance. Giving you just enough to stay alive in This, but that can't go on forever. It simply can't.
No one can make a sacrifice for you. I can't. No one in this group can. Nor can anyone out in Life. Everyone is Life is comfortable, even in their misery and no one makes sacrifices. They can't. If an ordinary person approached something resembling a Real sacrifice, they would feel as though they were "coming apart at the seams", or had "lost their minds". And when you make Effort, you are sacrificing your place in the grid.
Some of you believe there is a "double standard" in effect, the group here treating itself in one manner, and everyone else differently. I have used the word "hostility" to describe the magnetic connection between everything in Life. It is the tensile strength that holds Life together. Everyone, without exception, is subject to this magnetic tension, including all the renowned humanitarians. The voices of hostility, sarcasm, or criticism are a form of energy transfer from one person to another. However, you can not by angry at anyone on this planet, while doing This Thing. You can't be critical and do This. It's not sufficient to simply agree and say, "Point well taken, what's next?" You should know by now that Real change does not operate in this manner.
No one who can See above the Line of consciousness could ever experience a sense of superiority toward anyone. This is not a struggle of "us against the world", because as I've said, I'm not here to cure world ills. The world isn't sick. I'm not here to "straighten things out". Nothing's crooked and nothing's broken. No one is going astray and no one is inferior to you. Neither were any of the ancient religious leaders attempting to resolve the problems of the world, though it appears that way as evidenced by the stories that subsequently arose. They were putting a jolt into Life and Life itself had to readjust. It's the same for Life as it is for you. You might feel at times as though you are catching glimpses of something extraordinary, yet everything is working to pull you back into your ordinary grid position. To do This, you must be continually interfering with your own circuitry. Loosening your own position in the grid by giving by giving it jolts and shocks. Life goes through the same process.
There is no double standard in effect. You can not harm anyone and do This, but by the same token, the sham humanitarianism that many of you might have expected is also useless. You can not interfere with the lives of anyone out in Life. Viewed objectively, such activity is unprofitable. If you're waiting for me to direct you to do so, you're in for a long wait. You must treat each other with more care, but the more you begin to See on your own, the more you'll realize that you can't interfere with anyone.
Only you know whether or not you belong here. Of course I know, but I'm not saying. So it's you and you. Any individual feelings that you may have of isolation, that you're not being treated with the respect you feel you deserve, are part of the baggage you carried in here. The baggage is your ordinary you. No one here is responsible for taking you under their wing. If such serious voices continue to speak for you, it may not be entirely your imagination.
Of course, you must be continually interfering with your own circuitry, giving it shocks and jolts. You can learn not to listen to yourself, and then learn to not talk to yourself. Try making decisions without telling yourself what you're going to do. This is not a play on words. Some of you already know this and some of you don't. Should you decide to take some action, such as giving up soft drinks, don't tell yourself. Don't discuss it with yourself, or anyone else, including me. The voices are going to want to talk about it. "Do you really want to give up soda? That's too hard. I'll cut down instead. Any time I want a soda, I'll drink water. But I hate water..." And on and on. You've got to make the decision, any decision without telling yourself about it.
You can literally divert the circuitry away from forming the explanations and descriptions it is mechanically inclined to draw. Let's go back to the example of feeling unwanted. You might initially tell yourself to stay away from such people, then five minutes later, apparently reverse your position and call it a trick, jolting your own internal wiring. You have a built in laboratory at your disposal. Use it. You should realize by now that anything running through the system is of almost no value to you in This. If it was of value, you and everyone else would be living beyond the Line. Thinking, feeling, and doing the same things over and over would be a virtue. In This, it's a sin, based upon a kind of trilateral morality, Real morality.
Depending upon the circumstances, people are wired to believe that they are in charge of themselves and the situation -- or are overwhelmed by it. In the latter case, a man might say, "It wasn't my fault. I was rear-ended. I had no control over the situation. He was responsible." Built into the wiring system is the belief that people are responsible and can be held accountable. By your own investigations, you should be able to See that there is no flexibility in thoughts, feelings, or behavior at the ordinary level. No one can be held accountable for their actions. No ordinary man can even tell you what he is going to say next.
Picture yourself as an operational corporation with a chief executive officer who is apparently in charge, and any number of underlings who are the lower circuitry. No knowledge base is necessary for the underlings to effectively carry out their assigned tasks. And no one expects the executive officer to take suggestions, much less directions from the lackeys. Yet every corporate executive takes their direction while believing themselves to be in charge. The information flows up to corporate offices, to the man apparently in charge, and all he does is place his rubber stamp of approval on it. It's useless information. You've already thought it. Useless feelings. You've already felt them. Useless behavior. You've already done it.
Down in the shipping department, your employees are grumbling about long hours, poor wages, or crumby working conditions. By the time the information reaches the level of the executive officer, all he can do is say, "Sure, I know all about the situation and it is under control." He can either approve or disapprove, it doesn't matter which, and by the time the information reaches his desk, it's rubber stamped. I've already told you, the Yellow Circuit is the last to know. The executive officer can state the company policies, but he doesn't know where they came from. He has no understanding of why he says what he says. Of course, if someone were to ask him a question, he'd suddenly have the unquestioned ability to say, "I'm glad you asked. Here's my plan..." And the flow would begin. That which I am calling ordinary consciousness is always the last to know. If you're calling that the chairman of the board, I'm not buying stock in your corporation.
You must stop entertaining and rubber stamping the information generated by the lackeys and underlings of your corporation. When the timing is right you might catch glimpses of what This is all about, yet the rest of the time, you're listening to the lackeys and shipping clerks, to the people hyperventilating downstairs, to the overweight people, to the people who drink too much, and smoke big cigars, to the people in research and development who do nothing but send up questions and schemes. You might wonder, "Who's paying these people? How did they even get on the payroll? What they do varies from being useless to a major nuisance. How can I get rid of them?"
There is a possibility beyond these voices. I'm talking to a place that's right above the executive officer. To the piece of you that can Hear. To the piece of you that has not yet been incorporated. Anything below the Level of consciousness is natural and necessary, but it is valueless for those of you who need more. You have all been close enough to taste the possibility of freedom from the complaints and cries. There are times when Conscious Effort is exerted and it's as though a fog has lifted. It's pure joy. And it's not accidental. Can you simultaneously See that you might shift slightly, it could be your posture, it could be anything, and you're once again rubber stamping piles of incoming information, feeling isolated, lost and unloved. It's not strange. It's the nature of being human. You're supposed to be uncomfortable. You're supposed to be dissatisfied. You, and everyone else, are supposed to be involved in a great search, be it the search for the perfect political platform, the perfect mate, or enlightenment.
The universal eulogy is, "He gave his whole life and ruined his health, but he sure gave a good fight." In This there is no such thing as a good fight. A "good fight" places you back in the world of the struggling and dissatisfied. If you die a seeker, you have failed.
Let me remind you of two openings, or bridge points which literally exist within the nervous system. The first occurs at the spot where energy flows into the nervous system at the base of the spine, traveling upward until it crossed a second bridge point into that which seems to be the mind. As with all my maps and picturizations, I'm deliberately leaving a flaw in the description in order to allow room for expansion. Life, in a sense, pinches off the bridge points. This isn't exactly correct, and it isn't based upon ideas such as, "Life has damaged me, and I must undo the harm." Or, "Life has forced me into an ordinary state of consciousness." No. No. The bridge points close up for a particular reason, but they are not absolutely and permanently closed. Periodically they open, allowing a certain kind of energy to flow. Sex is one of the primary ways the lower bridge point can be opened. Laughter serves a similar purpose at the second site.
It should come as no surprise that the functioning of these points is a reflection of a wider reality. I'll begin with "laughter" and you'll have to find your own corollary for "sex". That which is accepted as humor, at Line level is always tied to ordinary hostility. Ordinary people laugh at another's apparent problems, stupidity, or foolishness and it dissipates energy. Laughter should transfer energy, should facilitate a surge of energy through the nervous system, but when a hostile garden variety humor is generated, the energy is dissipated. Ordinary laughter and sex temporarily alleviate the build-up of pressure at those two bridge points, instead of precipitating an opening wide energy flow.
Let's return to the matter of being able to Consider the Life of Life itself. Life is still attempting to Understand itself as reflected through the study of men, who are the form within Life's body. This study has always had a name, be it known as philosophy, religion, or that which humanity has currently named psychology. If Life itself has a life, a closed system with one entry and exit point, then until death everyone is locked into this system. No money comes in and no money leaves the system. Anything you can acquire or can have taken from you, remains in the system. Of course, I'm not talking about money and possessions. How can this be true? It is true, but how is it possible?
At a level beyond form, there are people within Life who Understand more than Life itself understands. People who have ignited areas of their own nervous systems in a way that Life has yet to experience. People living beyond Line-level consciousness, Life's own Level of consciousness. The proof can be found among the few who are beyond any form of anger. In this regard, Life is still fighting. People are still at war. Nations are still at war. All of that is still happening in Life, and yet, there are people on this planet with nervous systems sufficiently activated to be beyond that type of behavior. Of course, to the Yellow Circuit, this isn't proof at all. It's insanity. How is it possible that within a closed system, there are individuals more conscious than Life, itself?
Examine your old dreams about historical prophets and gods. All of humanity believes such figures must have been loving and compassionate. Beyond anger. Able to literally, turn the other cheek. Life feels it. People such as this existed and they exist today. If they Understood enough, they'd know that nothing in Life is broken, no one can be held responsible for their actions, nor are there evil people in the world. That things are arranged the way they are for a purpose. So how is it possible that in spite of the fact that such people existed, humanity has been continuously engaged in self-slaughter? How can this be? How can individual parts of the system operate at a higher level, in certain areas, than the system itself?
Can you Consider the responsibility this entails? To be more advanced in certain areas than Life itself. To be beyond any form of hostility while Life is still producing wars, murder, and the random hostility which holds everything together. Did you think This Thing is an attempt to achieve Life's own Level of consciousness? Humanity already operates at that level. You have the blues, worry about your terrible temper, and feel isolated and generally miserable. That is the level of the ordinary consciousness of Life itself, as manifested through man. There is no such thing as a personal problem, or individual responsibility. They are the voices of Life speaking through people.