One guy’s attitude toward himself
was about the same as toward others,
thus accounting for his popularity
both here and abroad.
By and large you can’t do anything
about the way you really look…
that’s why cosmetic surgery
is so cheap and compassionate.
One Revolutionist’s most favored comment
to himself was, “Shut up and dance.”
This one king, when speaking of himself, would sometimes use the singular “I,” and at others the royal “We”; he explains that through this tactic he can take credit for the successes, while laying the failures on the people. (And one subject noted that part of the benefit of being “the people” is that you’re always well prepared for the inevitable.)
A man found a steam iron;
he took it home;
it didn’t work;
he didn’t care
‘cause all his habits
were permanent press.